001. Money is my Boyfriend: Building a Relationship with your Finances
Welcome to the first episode of Old Money!
Shake up a martini, slip into some silky PJs and get ready to get intimate with your money- today we're talking about building a healthy relationship with cash.
Today, Amber breaks down her 3-step process to making money your boyfriend. From changing the negative dialogue in your head to taking your finances out on a date, you'll learn the basics of treating your money with respect. Plus, you'll receive concrete examples of money affirmations to create a healthy money mindset today.
Let's approach money with neutrality and break down any fear so you can cultivate the generational wealth you've been vying for.
In today's episode, we cover the following:
Welcome to the podcast and what you can expect! (0:30)
Birdie & Bogey of the week (special thank you to everyone who's already reviewed the podcast!) (7:22)
Your relationship with money (17:51)
Making money your boyfriend Step #1: Manage the dialogue (22:29)
Step #2: Respect the details (26:55)
Step #3: Date your money (32:07)
Amber's hot tip of the week! (35:00)
TRANSCRIPT
Speaker 1 (00:02)
Welcome to Old Money, a show dedicated to helping you build the trust fund you wish you were born with. Ladies who lunch, listen up. Life is not about looking rich. I want you to build a life and a legacy that feels rich in every sense of the word. If you're ready to stack cash, talk shop, and trade insider secrets, you're in the right place. These are the new rules to Old Money, so let's get after it. Here we are. Welcome to the show. Welcome to the Old Money Podcast. I am your host, Amber Frankhuizen. I'm just so grateful that you're here. Thank you for showing up on this episode. Oh, my gosh. Let's just start it off honest. We're going to get intimate together. I'm probably in your car, in your headphones, something like that. So might as well just start being really honest with the fact that this is the fourth take of episode one. So embarrassed about it, but let's get real. It's been really hard to get started on this. First take was a practice. I knew it was going to be scrapped. I went way off the rails, out of pocket.
Speaker 1 (01:09)
I was a woman-possessed. It didn't make any sense at all. I worked it over and I was like, Okay, this one's a little bit better, but I know I can perfect this. Then on the third take, I did. I perfected it. It was gorgeous and my microphone was broken. You guys, my microphone was broken. So it just didn't record correctly. Now we're back with take four. I'm just thinking it's a blessing in disguise because I pulled the transcript from episode three, and I had in 37 minutes, I had used the word like 188 times. There was one, but 188 likes. And that is a crime. Nobody should be subjected to that. I apologize in advance for using the word like on this podcast. Come for me in the comments. Come for me in the reviews. I know you will, but I will try my best to avoid it. Please know that I'm conscientious of it. It's just the Valley Girl in me that wants to come through. We have a mix of personalities of this East Coast, Old Money and this California, San Diego beach bum. I'll try. Here we are, take four of the first episode.
Speaker 1 (02:22)
Listen, my goal on these episodes is to make them super snappy, super efficient. I want to make good use of your time and I want this to be a positive ROI for you. I'm not here to waste anyone's minutes and it's just better because we're going to cut it down to condense it. Honestly, I'm more clear now than I ever was before. It's been really hard to figure out how to get started because I have so much that I want to talk about and there's so many things to cover. I've been like, What am I going to get started with as it relates to adding value quickly and getting everything? But the reality is for me personally, building my net worth and my business and my wealth has taken many, many years. I expect this podcast to go for many, many weeks, months or years, hopefully, God willing. And we can continue to have these conversations and they'll evolve and there'll be new things that come up. I haven't known how to get started because there's too much to discuss. But I thought for the first episode, we could talk about the easiest and for me, the most fundamental things that I have done to change my relationship with money for the better.
Speaker 1 (03:29)
I didn't even know I had a relationship with money, and we'll talk about it, but we're going to get into it today. But before we do, I want to set the scene of where I'm at, what I'm doing the whole nine yards. Take you behind the scenes a little bit. I'm sitting on my bed because of the acoustics. There's more fabric in here than my office. It's three o'clock on a Friday. I implemented this year, Summer Fridays, which between Memorial Day and Labor Day, our offices close at noon on Fridays. I mean, we're working remotely anyway, so we just log off at noon on Friday. Summer Friday is such an old money thing. I know you know the skincare brand now, but it's the concept of closing shop early on Friday so people can get out to the shore, to the Hampton or whatever. I'm bringing it over here to the West Coast because I think we need some balance during the summer. We need some opportunity to get outside and see the sun and enjoy our time. If you are a fan of Real Housewives of New York and you know that Carol Radziwill said that she only had so many good summers left.
Speaker 1 (04:36)
That's honestly true for all of us. There are only so many good summers that we have to play, to enjoy, to live our lives. I feel as though we need to make good use of them. And for me, no, I'm not out and about on a Friday afternoon. I'm in bed in my pajamas and I'm recording this podcast. But for me, that is 100 % my definition of success. Not only do I get to work on something that is passion for me, and it's not a client project, it's an Amber project, and it's a service project, and it's something that I have creative control over. That's an absolute dream. And listen, I own my own business, so I get to set the rules. I get it 100. But if you're finding success in your corporate journey and you're like, Oh, I'm never able to do that. The reality is if you're going to go through the corporate structure to find your success, which go off sis 100, there are opportunities to be mega successful within those constructs. You still, as you progress through your career, get to change the rules and be in charge of your own schedule.
Speaker 1 (05:39)
And the faster you can figure out how to do that, the better off your life will be, the more balance that you'll have. I'm obviously a big fan of new streams of income and entrepreneurship, but that doesn't mean that's the only way. So just a little food for thought, because I think one of the things we're going to talk a lot about is that wealth is not just about having money in your bank. It's about having control of your life and having resources and being able to make decisions that serve you. And so right now, on this Friday afternoon, I'm feeling so wealthy sitting here talking with you. So the first order of business is this is your reminder to take the days off. No one is impressed when you don't take your PTO. Remember the kids in elementary school that got the awards for best attendants? That was not me. It will never be me. But what are they doing today? The pendulum's got to swing, baby. They are probably dealing with some overachiever anxiety. But the reality is you deserve to take time. It is your summer. We only have so many good summers to play with.
Speaker 1 (06:39)
Let's take advantage of it. Am I right? We're here to talk about wealth. We're here to talk about living well, building wealth, and we will week after week after week, but also week after week. I want to take you a little behind the scenes and let you know what's up. You know this, but there was a poll. 90% of Fortune 500 executives claim that they like to play golf. I don't play golf. I don't know how to play golf. It's okay if you don't either. But we're going to get into this old money tradition. Whether you call it a sport or a game, it is one of the best ways to do business. A few hours on a course with a business contact, you got them as a captive audience. You can sell them, you can catch up. That's what we're going to do here every single week with our Birdie and Bogey of the Week. It's like the highs and lows, if you will. Maybe it's about my life or the world or things that are making the mark or missing the mark. Again, if you don't play golf, don't stress, but neither do I.
Speaker 1 (07:31)
But a Birdie is good. It's when you get one stroke under par. In a bogey, you missed the mark. You're one stroke over par. My birdie of the week has been all of the support that you have given me that I have felt. I'm feeling it from all of my community, my network, my friends, like beyond grateful. My colleagues and clients like, Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. The way that my crew has just hyped me up is absolutely insane. The other day I was sitting in the office and I was actually doing a research project for one of our agency clients who are also launching a podcast. I'm so excited for you to hear their podcast as well. We'll talk about that later. I was going through Apple Podcast looking for some inspo on cover art and seeing what's trending. I'm scrolling through the Apple charts and I saw my face and the old money cover and I legitimately screamed. Justin was in the office with me, made him jump. Yes, I do work in the same room as my boyfriend. We will talk about it, I promise. That's a whole other story. But I cannot believe it.
Speaker 1 (08:34)
Because of all the support that you all have given me by listening, downloading, et cetera, we were featured on Apple's top trailers charts. With just the trailer, we reached number 50 on Apple Podcasts in the US, self-improvement category, and then number 99 at the highest on the education category. I don't know if you guys know this, but podcasting has been taken over by celebrities. Every single person in COVID was like, I'm just going to start podcast. And the fact that I'm within reaching distance of them all is beyond. I'm a podcast junkie. I listen to everything, which is why I'm here. I just needed more content. I listen to everything that's out there. That's why we're here, making more content, right? But I am just beyond grateful. I see you. I am grateful for you. For the person that left the three-star review, I am so sorry I did not meet your expectations in the trailer, but I will try harder. And for the person that left a one-star review, I am so sorry that I hurt you in life. And it probably wasn't intentional unless it was intentional. And then we can talk. But I see you as well.
Speaker 1 (09:39)
And listen, I am open to so much feedback. I want to know what you all think about everything. I want to know about how is the sound quality? Do you think the intro is too long? What do you think is good? What do you want to talk about? Everything that you want to be happening on this podcast, I'm putting it out not for myself, but for a wider audience. I want women to get rich. So.
Speaker 1 (10:00)
Tell me what you want to talk about, tell me what you like, and let's tailor it so it's something that you want to turn on all the time. Anyway, the goal in the next couple of weeks as we launch is going to be to get to the Apple podcast new and notable chart. I don't know why that's so important to me. I've just had that on my vision board in my head of something that would be a good milestone to hit. So if you have not already done so, if you could be so kind to rate, review, and subscribe to this podcast. To rate means to leave a couple of stars. Five is great. To review means to leave your thoughts, some comments, and to subscribe. You just click that little plus button, and then your downloads will be counted in my downloads for the month. And that will really help the podcast grow. And if you want to go check out the review that I left for myself from my mother's iPad, you're more than welcome to go into the comments and check it out and leave on while you're there. Thank you so much.
Speaker 1 (10:51)
Again, I hope you feel my heart like I'm so grateful for you. There was a like, you can count that. Anyway, on the flip side, my bogey of the week has been my own damn fault and something I want to talk to you guys about because this is so basic. You're going to be like, Duh, nobody likes to be hung over. Yeah, my bogey of the week was I went way overboard and I don't even drink a lot anymore. It's summertime. I'm vibing on a sancerre, an albariño, obviously champagne. But I'm normally a glass a year, a glass there. I'm more of a lunchtime drinker on a Saturday, then I take a nap at five o'clock, then I feel great on Sunday. But what I'm realizing now more and more is it's not even about the hangover, it's about the anxiety that I'm getting a couple of days later. Last Friday, we went out with some friends that we made a new couple of friends that we made through Justin's work. I'm obsessed with them. They're the most fun. We went to, if you're familiar with San Diego Starlight, which is here in San Diego.
Speaker 1 (11:51)
It's super 60s, sexy, think Don Draper, Mad Men, wood paneling, mahogany, everything very dark inside. You never know what time of day it is. We got there on a Friday and we just had this buzz saw of a week, Justin and I, and we sit down and there's two margaritas for us and then there's two more margaritas. Next thing I know, we're rallying and we're going to our place to finish the party and I'm ordering Drizly, so there's going to be champagne to be delivered when we get there. I have no idea why, but we just sent it. We had the best time ever. In Saturday, it was a disaster. I was unwell in my bed. But it wasn't until Sunday night where the wheels totally fell off. I'm talking about I'm crying, I'm overthinking. I'm telling myself in my head, I cannot do this. I'm never going to be able to keep up with this podcast and the business and our clients. I should shut it all down. This is so embarrassing. I was essentially completely irrational. I will tell you my number one trick to being successful in business is being completely delusional and just thinking that everything's going to work out even when it feels like it won't.
Speaker 1 (13:01)
If I am in a state, a headspace of not being able to see things positively, I know I'm going to fail. I just know it. That's why I've really been wrestling with drinking. If I want to continue or if I'm like being sober, curious, and I am, to be quite honest with you. I started doing sober October quite a few years ago. Then I don't know why, but October is just a fun month to drink, so I stopped doing it in October. The seasons change, football starts, all that stuff. But I've been doing four weeks off here, six weeks off there. In fact, I just did that earlier this year. And what I'm noticing is that when I have a baseline of feeling better, when I start to dabble again, it really quickly lowers my baseline of how I feel. One of the things about becoming wealthy, the reason we want to be wealthy, the reason we want to have money is because we want the feelings associated with it. Yeah, we want to drive the car, but why do we want to drive the car? Because we think it's going to make us feel great.
Speaker 1 (14:05)
Why do we want the watch? Because we want to put it on and feel good about it. Why do we want to have a business that we set our own schedules for? Because we want the feeling of freedom. Why do we want wealth? Because we want to feel secure. We want all of these feelings that we're seeking all the time. And here I go, putting alcohol into my body and then feeling terrible about it when I could just decide now to start feeling good. And I will tell you that is one of the fastest tricks to feeling wealthy is to start feeling the feelings you want to feel when you have the thing, when you think you'll feel when you have the thing now. I'm really struggling with this because I love a glass of champagne. I love a glass of crisp, cold wine, especially on a Friday, maybe after I finish recording this podcast, but I'm not sure if the cost-benefit ratio is working out in my favor. And if I'm going to achieve these big, audacious goals, I just have to be a clear channel and I have to be positive. I have to think the best thing is going to happen.
Speaker 1 (15:03)
I'm trying to really navigate how to do that, especially with so many work events that are centered around drinking, networking and things. I'm seeing a lot more alcohol-free options and alcohol-free conversations. What I would love to know from you all is have you adjusted your drinking, stopped drinking because of your goals? And what has that process been like for you? I think that's a conversation that we need to have. Right now, while I'm in creation mode and really focusing, and we call this Monk mode. And what that means is basically you put your head down and you just focus and work. And Monk mode is hyper-focused, no distractions. All I'm doing is achieving my goal. And that's what I'm in right now for this podcast. And also our business is blowing up and it's so crazy busy, and I've got to focus on that as well. So for me, every night I'm drinking topochico and I'm putting it in a wine glass. I'm drinking kombucha. The cayenne cleans is my favorite. It tastes like a skinny, spicy. I'm trying to figure it out and balance it all, but also wanting to go out with our friends and there's history there of alcohol.
Speaker 1 (16:09)
We're going to have to figure that out together. Let's continue to talk about it. But let's actually get back to this feeling of wealthiness and this feeling that we're trying to go after and what we're talking about today. You probably saw the title of the podcast, but today's conversation is all about our relationship with money. Let me just get this out of the way. The Old Money as a brand, I build brands for a living, and quite frankly, putting this shiny veneer of the trendiest thing that's happening on social and in the zeitgeist right now of Old Money: Sophia Richie, Bluebloods, Nepo Babies. Nothing else matters to society right now than old money in my mind and Barbie, actually. But this is such a trend, and I wanted to package these conversations about mindset and success and navigating challenging things like investments and what to do and put it in something sexy and put it in something that's not Susie Orman yelling at you on the radio. It's not Dave Ramsey shaming you for wanting a new car. I want you to embody your wealth now. I want you to live well now. And we're going to talk about all the ways to do that, whether it's purses, wardrobe, travel, living well, investing well, making better decisions, supporting your current self and your future self.
Speaker 1 (17:27)
And I'm just going to be a wolf in sheep's clothing. We're going to talk about the nitty-gritty stuff, all the stuff nobody else is talking about. But I want to attract you all here with the sexiness of old money. Come on over. I've got some gray coupon, and we're going to do this old-school money style. But the reality is we're going to talk about some of the basics, the fundamentals. Yes, we'll get into your 401Ks and investing. But today it's all about your relationship with money. And you're thinking like, Why do I need a relationship with money? Money is just dollars in my wallet or in my bank account. I used to think that too. I never was conscious to my relationship with money because it was informed by old patterning and old thoughts that I didn't even come up with on my own. I just absorbed them. As children, we just get so much information as adolescents and young adults. We're just absorbing and doing the best that we can. Your brain is not even fully formed till you're 25, right? I was one of those case studies. I really struggled through high school, through college, graduating, working three jobs, really struggling.
Speaker 1 (18:36)
And it wasn't until I had to take steps back to be like, Everything's broken. I've always been in debt. At one point, I was five figures in debt. I was trying to figure out my whole life. And it all came back to, How do I even think about money? And I personally was afraid of it. I didn't think that I would ever have enough. And I thought I was always going to struggle. And I also had this mindset that getting it was going to be really, really hard. I love my mom so much. Hi, Rosie, if you're listening to this, but I tease her to this to this day. But my mom used to say something to my friends and I when she would drop us off at school in the morning, and she would always say, Okay, guys, try and have a good day. Yeah, that's right. Try. It would be so impossible to have a good time at school. We're in high school for God's sakes. Nothing's happening. I get her sentiment. It was well intentioned. It's like you'd rather have it be the weekend. The weekend is more fun. Try and have a good time at school when you don't really want to be there.
Speaker 1 (19:33)
But what I learned from that was that work or school was always going to be effort to enjoy or to get anything out of. That was just programming that I had installed in me. Think about it this way. If you are a computer, if you are a person, you are the type of person that has Windows 98 running on your hard drive right now. It's 2023, baby. You got to upgrade that shit. And so what you need to do is recognize what you have installed and then uninstall it so that you can build a relationship with money. And that's part of my three-step process that I'll get to today. But the other part of the conversation, before we talk about building a relationship with money is A, do you have one? We talked about that. B, what is money? How do you have a relationship with something that is not a person? And the reality is that anything that you're in relation to, you have a connection with. And I started calling money my boyfriend and everything changed. And by the way, I am a straight woman, so I date men or boys, my boyfriend.
Speaker 1 (20:36)
If you are not straight, if you are a man, if you're just looking for a life partner, maybe somebody to take to bed, whatever you want to use for your framework of this. I'm just looking for you to build intimacy with your money and creating a partnership with your money. And that's what I've done with my money in order to have it in my life. And money is not masculine. It's not feminine. It is inherently neutral. So all these woo woo conversations about like, money is feminine. No, it's masculine. It's just not. Money is what you get in exchange for value. When you do something for someone else, they will reward you with a paycheck or a payment. And then when you need something of value, you will exchange your money in exchange for the thing that you want or need. So it can be looked at as energetic. It can be looked at as physical. But the reality is if you want something, you need to figure out how you can be in concert with it as opposed to in contrast with it. Because if you are in conflict with your money, you are not going to attract more of it.
Speaker 1 (21:39)
That's the end of the story. So yes, you need a relationship with money because you want to attract more of it into your life. It's not negative. It's not positive. It's not masculine. It's not feminine. It's inherently neutral. Money is not the root of all evil. It does not make people good or bad. It's just an amplifier, quite frankly, of what it is that you want to put out in the world or your true essence, your true character. Making money your boyfriend. By the way, I don't think I came up with that terminology. I feel like some influencer said that one time, and I tried to google it to see if I could find who and all that came up were articles of how to get your boyfriend to give you money. Listen, babe, we can totally talk about that in another episode. That's not what we're here to do today. Today, we're talking about the three steps that I took to change my relationship with money and make money my boyfriend. The first step in that process is the dialog, managing the dialog. Again, back to what I was saying is how do you talk about money?
Speaker 1 (22:38)
If you're thinking about this in an analogy, like you're going to be looking to find somebody to date, think about what the language is when you're not having success in dating. You're like, There's no good men in my city. There's no quality men anywhere. I hate swiping. Everybody's just out for the next best thing. If you continue to say those things, you will make them true. And the reason for that is because we, as human beings, our brains, they hate to be wrong. So once you say something, your brain to protect your ego is going to do everything that it can to prove you right. So when you say there are no good men to date, guess what? You will not find any good men to date. And for me, I'll tell you from a personal perspective, when I changed my ideas about what I wanted in a relationship and who was out there for me, Justin came into my life and I met my life partner. It is so true that what we say in the privacy of our own minds becomes our reality. So if you are not managing the dialog that you have around your money, you will likely continue to have a very unconscious relationship with money and then wonder why it's not coming to you.
Speaker 1 (23:49)
Let me give you a couple of examples of number one, identifying, just saying, like hatching yourself. When you say something in your mind, when you see somebody wealthy, what is your response? Are you saying, Oh, it must be nice. Because you know what? It probably is very nice. And what I would challenge you to say instead is good for them? Wow, that's an expansion moment. Something for me was that I used to get really jealous when I would see people doing really well. And instead now of getting jealous, I get curious. I'm looking at them and I'm like, Oh, wow, I wonder how she got that bag or how her business is set up or how she's able to take those vacations. I would like to ask more questions. And it's totally neutralizing all of that envy that I feel. And quite frankly, it's helped me build relationships because then I can go with a clean heart and no jealousy or resentment towards them and say, I saw you on vacation with X, Y, Z. How did you build that life? How are you doing this? And then you know what? I get the tips.
Speaker 1 (24:49)
Because if you're saying, Oh, must be nice, or, Oh, eat the rich, and you can't even afford to order an appetizer at dinner, you have resentment in your heart, honey. And you need to resolve that so that you don't create this friction to having money because your brain wants you to be right about this hate that you have towards rich people. So it's going to keep you poor. It's just the long and short of it. I really challenge you to start to identify if you have those hair-trigger reactions. Is that the right word? Is hair-trigger? I don't think that's right. Hairline? No, hairline fracture. You get what I'm saying. If you have a hot take on somebody that's wealthy and it's coming from a place of jealousy or resentment, there's actually probably something deeper there, like anger or fear. Actually, anger covers up a lot of emotions. There is this incredible concept called the Atlas of emotions, where there are, I think, six basic emotions in anger is one of them, and it's called an anger iceberg. It harbors other emotions underneath it. So it could be embarrassment, loneliness, depression, fear. And fear was the big one for me.
Speaker 1 (25:57)
I always felt like I wasn't going to have enough. When there's so much anger and resentment out there, I get it. There are a lot of fears to have as a young person, as a graduate, as a millennial, a Gen Z, you're trying to navigate this economy. I absolutely understand it. But when you have the gift of perspective, which I have been trying to educate myself on for the last 20 years on the cycles of the market, and Tony Robbins's book, Unshakable, was the one thing that clicked in my head that it's bad now, it will be better later. Nothing is forever. When you can have that, you have some faith and some peace that things will ebb and flow and you'll come back up for air again, and it helps you release a lot of that anger, resentment, and fear that you have. Number one step is managing the dialog that you have with money to improve your relationship with money. The second step in making money to your boyfriend is all about the details. Let's again analogize this. Let's talk about when dating. When you are dating somebody, you're swiping on hinge, you're going out.
Speaker 1 (27:04)
I think you probably have some ritual around getting ready. You're taking an everything shower, you've got your nails done, your hair is blown out, you're wearing an outfit you feel confident in. And maybe this is actually a super hot tip. If you are dating right now, what you need is one first date outfit. It is the first date outfit that you wear on all your first dates, so you never have to worry about what you're wearing on a first date. And this thing that shows off all of your assets, you feel super hot and sexy in it, and you wear it on repeat on your first dates, so you never have to think about it again. That is a hack from Steve Jobs/Amber Frankhuizen. But my point is, when you're getting ready for dates, you are paying attention to the details and you are ritualizing them, more than likely. I'm going to ask you this. When was the last time you did anything ritualistic about your money? Probably never, because all you do is you pull your credit card, you shove it back in your purse, it's lost. It's always in your Lululemon belt bag.
Speaker 1 (27:59)
Then you have your nice wallet and it's not there and your bills are all crushed and your whole purse is full of receipts because you got to return stuff to Nordstrom and there's stuff lying everywhere. Let me tell you something, baby. The way that you manage your wallet is a really good reflection of the care that you put around your money. I would challenge you to pay attention to the details of your money in order to build your relationship with money. And the couple of ways that I started to do that was by very simple stuff. Number one, cleaning out your wallet. Having a wallet that you love and feel is very precious to you because it is storing some of the most precious things in your life, which are the instruments you use to conduct money exchange or energy exchange. So clean out your wallet, make sure everything's looking good, looking really beautiful, and let's make it nice and organized. On top of that, things that I used to do when I would have a lot of bills, I used to be on a very strict budget and I would only pay in cash.
Speaker 1 (28:51)
And I would make sure that my bills were organized, they were in order from lowest to highest denomination. All of the bills were facing the same way. And sometimes if they were old and crinkly, I would just get a little iron and steam shot them really quick and make them nice and flat and crisp. And it makes you feel a lot better about that money. And it's more precious to you. Therefore, maybe you don't want to spend it as much. And speaking of spending it so much, the details of where your money goes are super, super important. So are you tracking your spending? Do you have any awareness around where things are going? I think that's something that we think is going to be okay. And then at the end of the month, we look at our bank account or our credit card bill and we say, Fuck. And we just hide it, avoid it, and we just don't look at it. And avoiding something, that's not the best way to get a second date with a guy or a girl. You need to confront it. You need to be empowered around it. And don't ghost your money.
Speaker 1 (29:48)
Don't not pay attention. Are you paying crazy fees for a broker or a financial advisor? Are there subscriptions that are just draining your bank account every month? Go and look at the details and I promise it'll just make you feel more aware to them. Another ritual that actually is super important is writing. Writing exercises I found have been so instrumental in just changing my relationship with money. Remember when you would have a spelling B or quiz and you would have to write the same word over and over and over again? Well, there's this woo woo technique. It's called 5 by 55 or 3 by 33 or whatever it might be. And for three days, five days, whatever, however much potency you want to put behind this, you can write down with your hand and a pen and a piece of paper affirmations over and over again. I am not about woo woo affirmations like I am a money magnet because I'm not. If I just sit on my couch and watch Housewives or sit right now in my pajamas on my bed and do nothing, I'm not just going to attract money by just being a lump.
Speaker 1 (30:55)
I have to go find the opportunities. You can take your affirmation, whatever is best for you, like I attract opportunities or I am empowered to manage my money or I love wealth, I love money, and write it for three days, 33 times a day and just see how that makes you feel. Also, just affirmations in general, there's a lot of resources out there that can help you with not only the ritual, but the dialog around it. I would look into a couple of different resources that I've used. Number one, Superhuman meditations by Mimi Bouchard. I am obsessed. These are the best things I listen to this every single morning, and I get super intentional about the details and the dialog that are happening in my mind, and it is my morning ritual. And it sets my mind right for not just about building wealth, but approaching the day in a way that's going to be beneficial for me and for my business and my clients and opportunities. And then also Amanda Francis, she has amazing, wealthy women meditations. They're available on YouTube, on podcasts. Check them out and make a ritual around how you're going to care for your money by paying attention to the details.
Speaker 1 (32:05)
Okay, the next thing, tip number three of improving your relationship with money and making money your boyfriend is you got to go on dates, baby. You don't get a new boyfriend or a husband or a life partner by not going out on dates. You have to go out on dates. I am very intentional about my money dates. I have a money date standing in my calendar because Google Calendar runs my life and everything that's in it gets done. I have a money date and it happens on the seventh of every month, which is the day that we get paid. And on the seventh, I go through and I double-check my paycheck. I look at all of my expenses from the month before. I save extra money, even though most of that is automated. I invest any money that I have sitting in cash in my investment accounts into wherever they need to go. I look at my goals. I look at if I overspent, underspent, I make sure all my credit card bills are paid. You know what I do? I light myself a candle, I pour myself a cup of tea or a cup of wine if I'm drinking, but we talked about that, and I make it a date.
Speaker 1 (33:07)
It is non-negotiable. I absolutely have to do it. When I was starting this, I used to do it weekly because my budgeting was non-existent. My spending was out of control and I needed to get my hands around everything and really know where I was on a week-to-week basis. I would recommend, if you are trying to improve your relationship with money, is get comfortable seeing money. Seeing your money can be really hard and really triggering, especially if you have debt, especially if you have a lot of insecurities or fear. And so I encourage you to at least build yourself confidence by keeping the promises to yourself that you will show up for those dates. And you don't have to solve all your problems in one day. I have a money date every single month. I used to have them every single week, and over the course of many months, I solved my money problems. But what I would suggest is maybe for your first money date, you just open the emails that you've been avoiding and write some numbers down. Or maybe you even want to just journal a little bit. I can put some journaling prompts up on social to guide what that might look like.
Speaker 1 (34:08)
Maybe you're just dreaming of what your wealthy life might be. Or maybe you're literally just taking 30 minutes to go outside with your dog and sit and think about some of the money stories that you have or some of the ways you've approached money. I would just encourage you to spend the time, when it's in your calendar, being intentional about spending time with your money. This week, let me know how it goes. Let me know how your date went. Maybe listening to this podcast episode is your day. I will allow that. But I'd love to know how it goes for you and what you think. And before I let you go today, I wanted to tell you about our other regular recurring segment, which is going to be my hot stock tip of the week where I tell you where to invest, when to buy, when to sell. Move over, Jim Kramer, you girl has got you covered. My tip for this week is you need to invest immediately in silk pajamas. You all, they make you feel so rich. I feel like such a vibe. I am so temperature regulated, silky smooth, but I'm literally wearing the ones from my photoshoot.
Speaker 1 (35:19)
If you've seen them on social, the Green Stripe pajamas. Wait, isn't that like a Holocaust book? Oh, that's dark. Is that what it is? Green Stripe? I'm not sure. Anyway, we're going to have revisit that. My point is the ones that I have from the company L and M online, I am obsessed with them and I'm sleeping so much better. There is nothing that makes me feel wealthier than having a good night's sleep. I will do a little roundup of some of the sets that I'm coveting at the moment, but it's got to be silk or satin. It's got to be luxurious because those are the standards we set in our lives to be wealth and body wealth, have wealth, and have it today, not in the future. Thank you so much for joining me on this episode. Listen, if you have questions, you want to chat about something specific, DM me on social at Old Money Podcast. You can send me an email at oldmoneypodcast@gmail. Com. By the way, I'm going to do a lot of advice segments because you might know this about me, but I've been mentoring college students and recent grads for the last 10 years.
Speaker 1 (36:22)
I can't believe it. You all are all asking the same questions, and they're all good questions. We want to get that message out at scale. So if you have something on your mind, I guarantee somebody else does too. So send in your questions, keep it anonymous. If there's anything about this episode that inspired you, let you up if you would be so kind as to write, review, and subscribe. I love you so much. One episode down and one million to go. I will talk to you on the next one. Bye. Feeling rich? I hope so. Thank you for joining me on this episode of Old Money. If you have questions you want answered, email me at oldmoneypodcast@gmail. Com or hit us up on social, we are at Old Money Podcast, and I am at your service. If this episode spoke to you, inspired you, helped you, if you took a single note, it would mean the world to me. If you could please just take a minute to write and review the podcast. And if you're not doing so already, subscribe. And if you have friends who like getting rich, please share this episode with them, even if it's just on your Instagram story.
Speaker 1 (37:23)
And I'd love you more than Jeff Bezos loves Amazon Prime. Thank you so much, and I will talk to you on the next episode. Remember, I'm not your lawyer, I'm not your tax professional, and I'm not your financial advisor. The content presented on this podcast is intended to entertain, educate, inspire, and support listeners and their personal and professional development and does not constitute business, financial, or legal advice. In addition to that, this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services.
Resources
Superhuman: guided meditations to tap into your potential
FREE: Wealthy Woman Meditation Series with Amanda Frances
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© Old Money 2023.
The content presented in this podcast is intended to entertain, educate, inspire and support listeners in their personal and professional development and does not constitute business, financial, or legal advice. Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services for which individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services related to the episode.
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